Larger than life




heh heh. been awhile since i posted. xD.
alot has happened man.
heh. and im finally studying for my CA's. XD. like, for ONCE man. XD.
okay, uhm, i dont have much to post about, but i wanna ask my friends out there to cheer up and not be sad :D. i shant mention names here, but still, you know who you are :D.

i just wanna say, that even when you're feeling down, dont resort to self hurt methods to feel better. ive been there(: i know how it feels like. but my knife was never sharp enough to cut, so dont worry about it. XD. anyway, dont hurt yourself. instead, find someone to talk to. i know it may not be easy and you'll feel like keeping it all in, but thats not the solution. if you do that, eventually one day itll be too much and youll just explode. like boom. xD.

so, basically, dont cut. it also drains you of precious blood. XD.


okay, now back to other stuff.
oh, my classmate got reprimanded for his blog ==. his mother tounge teacher somehow read his blog, which, apparently, he wrote some pretty bad stuff bout teachers.

lesson learnt - if you wanna defame people, MAKE YOUR BLOG PRIVATE. XD.

i mean, im not encouraging it, but thats basically what a blog is for what. to scribble down some thoughts and to vent your anger. but SOME people just cant seem to let others have their way and THEY just HAVE to lodge a complain. which in turn, the author is forced to delete that blog. if thats the case, whats the point of a bloody blog? ==

so, if you wanna keep a blog, when you vent your frustrations, try not to- no wait. DONT mention names. use code names if you like. UN-obvious code names. or, if you really have to mention names, keep your blog private. like, only let your friends with permissions to read or sth. XD. so yeah

im gonna go bath now. depressed people out there, TAKE CARE :D. ill be praying!
Blogged @ 5:09 AM
Don't let me go -

i am sick.


people. please pray for me(:
Blogged @ 5:15 AM
Don't let me go -

Miracles do happen(:


you know what? i had a high fever today. like 38.7 and all. i felt like dying. i volmited. i ahd a major headache. i couldnt move from the bed cause i felt darn giddy. then, guess what? my mum prayed for me. then i went to sleep(: i woke up feeling better. then when i got up, i suddenly felt like puking.

so, i closed my eyes. my last ditch attempt at being well again. i prayed. i told God that i was sorry that i had doubts last night, as you can see in the post below :x
then i prayed for His healing touch. i told God that i had the faith that He would heal me. then i started singing 'From The Inside Out' by Hillsong. then i took my temperature. 37.2.

miracles do happen. for me, my faith has healed me(: i feel perfectly fine alr. except maybe abit dizzy. XD. but i can move about alr.

i am healed.

oh, and thanks to debs and abby for praying for me :D

and thank You, God for healing me(:


Blogged @ 11:37 PM
Don't let me go -

do you know whats worth fighting for?


aish. had fever today. and if that isnt bad enough, i feel like shit.
why's the world so screwed up? why does life even exist anyway?
and why does a church have to be so complicating? shouldn't it be like a safe haven? instead of a bloody gossip ring. i know nothing is perfect, but of all things, why a GOSSIP ring in a CHURCH?
even though that darn gossip rign might not be appicable to me, it pisses me off. its a church for goodness sake =.=
and thats not all. seems like its hard to make friends anymore. friends get stolen away. well, friend. but still, a friend is a friend. even if its only one. what is up with this world now? ugh.

everything's screwing up now. im even considering another church =.=
what the shoot.

bloody hell. now my ipod's missing. my parents are both pissed off at me. what the shoot. now i myself cant be sure if it was stolen ==. aish. i wanna trust my friends, but.. aish. im just gonna pray.



Blogged @ 6:50 AM
Don't let me go -

Greatest day :D


today(friday) went out with abby, sean, celine, phoebe, beatrice, debs, yuhern and david :D
we were supposed to meet at like 1pm at harbourfront luh. then celine 12pm then reach home ==. bathe like uber long man. then we like 1.30 then leave her house. HAHAHAHA.

okay, then went to harbour front, met yh and went to the kopitiam(:
met the rest there. then we crapped for awhile and went upupup to the cinema.
yuhern and david went MIA for awhile. walau. those two like some emo couple luh =.=
then david pushed beatrice at the sky park and she tripped over a bag and rolled down the slope. HAHA :x. fortunately she stopped before hitting the curb man. haha. Thank God luh(: later got injury =.=.

okay, then went daiso, bought some stuff to smuggle into the cinema. omg. i just realised that the inflatable balloon and small brush i bought was in the plasitc bag with the trash and i threw it away. =.= AHHH. 4bucks gone -.-

okay, then went to the movie. darn retarded luh, we kept screaming before the movie started. HAHAHAHA.
the movie was not bad(:
then after that we went to crap around, beatrice left and we met samantha. then she said hi and left =.=. then went to eat. da pao-ed subway and went to the sky park to eat :D. darn fun man. haha. then debs left for tuition. then we crapped alot and then went to pet safari(: then went home :D

me sean and yh followed the train all the way to tanah merah cause we had nothing better to do :X. then went seven eleven and bought drinks :D. then me and sean took bus to mrt and zack went off wandering :/

okay, then now im home and im tired :D. gonna go watch my full metal alchemist and then sleep alr. nights people :D



koibito(:
Blogged @ 8:55 AM
Don't let me go -

No One Else




its 4.18am. for once im not tired.
this is weird.
i never thought itd be so hard.
i feel like crying.
its hard not to, but im holding it in..(:






i stood at the highest point of my home.
the cool night air was battering at my face.
i looked out towards the city.
bright, bright lights.
holding up the ring to my eye level, i looked at the cramped up buildings of Singapore through the ring.
where should i throw it?
i thought to myself.

i looked back towards Zack and David.
what if the ring hits someone?
i said out loud. but deep inside, i knew it was an excuse. i didnt want to throw the ring away.
i never knew it was so hard. why couldnt i just let go of the damn ring? a few minutes ago i just dumped winnie's old letters down the rubbish chute. why was this so hard?

where is Great World City?
Zack asked me.
uhm. if tiong bahru is there.. then great world city should be about there.
i said as i pointed in the right direction
throw it towards there.
Zack told me.
why?
enquired a very confused me.
that was where you had your first date. wasn't it?
Zack replied
i didn't reply.

David walked up beside me, bag of chips in hand.
Want some?
he asked with a smile on his face
i smiled as i refused the kind gesture.
looking out towards the direction of GWC
Zack. David.
i spoke out loud as i turned around to make sure Zack was looking.
watch.

As i raised my hand to toss the ring. It wouldnt budge. my movement ceased as my hand stretched out to prepare for the throw.
Scream. if you have to. let it out.
the voice of Zack called out to me from behind.
after a few moments of hesitation, i let loose my hand to throw the ring.
only to find that my clenched fist which contained the ring refused to open, even after i released my arm to toss the darn thing.
i stood there. thinking. this was harder than i thought.

then, i bowed my head and prayed

Dear Lord, as i let go of this ring, i leave everything to You. i let go of the past.
may You walk beside me and guide me as i start this new life. and forget the past. Amen.

with that. i looked up. my fist was clenched.
i readied my hand for a long and powerful throw
im sure i wont scream. whats the point?
i thought in my head.

with a dash of bravery and hope
and an unexpected loud shout
i let loose the ring from my hand.
just as i let go of this past of mine, turn over a new leaf, and live life properly.
my final burden has been unloaded.
get out of my head, winnie

I am over you.
Blogged @ 1:18 PM
Don't let me go -